Romance: "I Aint Dead Yet!"

'"Romance is dead" ..That's what they said while sitting around cheating at pool..At the very last frame of this 9 ball game..the one who had the date at the top of the Empire State..is the one who got hustled...like a fool..'

Those of you who found that poem immediately familiar might remember it from one of my faves, "Love Jones." And in light of the fact that Valentines Day is upon us...it brings me to today's blog topic: Is Romance Truly Dead?

If you spend as much time watching random reality tv shows as most of America seems to these days you would be inclined to think that not only romance but true love itself was dead. With shows like "I Love New York", "Flavor of Love" and Vh1's latest television travesty "For the Love of Ray J" you have to wonder. And how ridiculous is the premise of these shows anyway? I mean really. You have random men and women who have never even met these stars dropping whatever they have going on (which usually isnt much I guess) and traveling from all over the country to fight for the attention/affections of admitted philanderers, and talentless celeb wannabes all proclaiming their sincere love and loyalty?? Riiiight.....*smirk of disbelief* Whats a diva to think??

The problem that I have with these shows is that they perpetuate the vlaues of quantity over quality, booties/breasts over brains and Mr./Ms. Right Now over Mr./Ms. Right. I do not even know how many times Ive seen someone on one of these shows send home the guy with a degree, proper grammar and some basic decorum opting instead for the 'bad boy' devoid of any goals...or struggle with the decsion of whether to keep the not so former stripper with nothing to offer with the exception of a big behind vs the self made entrepreneur who refuses to demonstrate her 'booty clapping ability' just to boost the ratings. Sad as it sounds, I know some people look at shows like this and get a dangerously false impression of whats considered acceptable when it comes to dealing with the opposite sex on an intimate level. If you ask me the classics still work and fighting to the death on national tv to get some stupid man/woman who's trying to create or revive their career is NOT a display of love or romance, despite what they say after handing out that much coveted last rose/glass of champagne/ridiculous bedazzled necklace during those elimination ceremonies.

All the blingage and over the top bravado works for about 10 min with the least discriminating of women, however if you aspire to a woman of substance or above average intelligence, you're going to have to dig deeper...and not necessarily into your pockets.

Ask any real woman and she'll confirm for you that the little things count. A compliment on her hair, reminding her how sexy she is with a little kiss before heading out to work, an impromptu foot rub while watching TV...are all great examples of displays of romance that speak more to intimacy rather than sex and cost absolutely nothing. Now that's not to say that a gift every now and again isn't warranted or appreciated, just that you don't need to do that just to show that you care.

And of course ladies in all fairness, I cant just let us off the hook. We are responsible for keeping the romance going as well. Men are usually pretty easy to please contrary to popular belief so little things score big points. Give him a back rub when you know he's had a hard day without demanding that he talk about it, leave him a little note to tell him that you love him, or get up off your behind and cook something for once! And of course you can take a few notes from Usher's 'Trading Places' if you really want to throw him for a loop. Spontaneity + Intimacy is always a good thing.

Hopefully this blog has inspired some of you to unearth the romance that we thought was dead and buried. I hope your Valentines days are filled with plenty of romance that's alive and kicking!

Here's to the resurrection of romance :o)

~The Diva