Cheaters Never Prosper....

Ok....so I know I havent been writing for the past month or so..and for those of you who actually read this blog..my apologies :o) Ive been a little out of sorts these days and havent been able to get in any serious blogging time...Hopefully all of that is behind me and I can get back on the grind effective immediately....Now with that out the way...my latest blog...

I have a few male friends...some who are ex-boyfriends, some whom I've never dated...and some who inexplicably ended up in the friend zone but have proven to be very close to me. We talk these male friends and I, about all kinds of things...sports (when I can tolerate it), curent events, politics, and relationships. Some claim to be in loving committed relationships, others are constantly trying to find an out because their significant others are slowly driving them insane, and others cheat...constantly. Whats interesting to me is how some men are able to make excuses for their cheating and in some cases do so unapologetically.

For alot of men I think cheating is something they feel they are driven to do by mates who lack the excitement, sexual audacity and overall stimulation needed to keep them from wandering. But what entrigues me even more is how vastly the definition of cheating differs between men and women and moreover person to person.

In my opinion you can certatinly cheat without anyone ever even getting naked. Cheating for me is more about the level of intimacy being shared rather than the act itself. Id feel far more hurt

and betrayed by a man for engaging in long late night phone conversations when I can never get him to open up to me than I would if I found out about his drunken night of sex with an old flame. Its about him sharing himself with another woman in a way that he wont with me. For those of you who remember the movie, "Brown Sugar" that was the issue between Nicole Parker and Taye Diggs. He opened up to Sanaa Lathan's character, about his life and dreams etc and wouldnt do so with his own wife....The jig was finally up when it was discovered that all that time the two were actually in love with eachother. Intimacy can be a dangerous thing once shared with someone who should be off-limits.

Allowing someone into your relationship in that way when youre committed to someone else is akin to inviting your worst enemy to your house for dinner. No matter how great the meal was everyone eventually feels uncomfortable, you feel like an idiot when you cant figure out why you invited them in the first place..but once they arrive the damage is done so youre forced deal with them until they make their exit. Afterall you cant invite someone to dinner and then just ask them to leave when you decide they've had enough right?

Of course there is something to be said for people making mistakes but its no mistake when you go to your ex's house totally planning to sleep with them...You sought out the situation and should be fully prepared to accept the unavoidable consequences which are sure to follow.

So men (and women, cause lord knows we cheat as well) the next time youre engaged in some situation that youre pretty sure you couldnt get away with if your significant other was within eyeshot, think twice...you may be doing something you'll end up regretting later.

Here's to knowing what you have at home...

The Diva